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Satire: 2024? It’s More Like 1984

Satire: 2024? It’s More Like 1984

Nico Troedsson, Staff Writer June 2, 2023

Pali Princical Dr. Pam Magee informed the community of the school’s proposed one-to-one Device Program on May 12, 2023. The program, scheduled for the 2023-24 academic year, will provide school-owned...

M&M’s® “Spokescandies” Threaten Our Democracy

M&M’s® “Spokescandies” Threaten Our Democracy

Gigi Appelbaum-Schwartz and Arik Kraft March 15, 2023

M&M’s® have officially rebranded, shocking America — and for good reason. The once sexy “spokescandies” have been seriously altered to fit an overtly progressive agenda. Most notably, the...

Satire: The Santos Subversion

Satire: The Santos Subversion

Shane Masterson, Staff Writer February 23, 2023

Another day, another lie. New York Rep. George Santos has been ridiculed after launching his political career for “mildly and lightly stretching the truth in a way to truly connect me to our core American...

SATIRE: Are Gemini Unfit for AP Biology?

SATIRE: Are Gemini Unfit for AP Biology?

Caily Galvez and Nico Troedsson June 3, 2022

Effective August 2022, Gemini students will no longer be able to register for AP Biology at Palisades Charter High School. Thanks to the efforts of the Zodiac Club, students will be granted access to advanced...

Let’s Have a Frank Talk about the Italianx, Cowbxy Populations (Satire)

Let’s Have a Frank Talk about the Italianx, Cowbxy Populations (Satire)

Luke Wiener, Staff Writer November 16, 2021

I sit with my head pressed up against the desk, my arms sprawled across its surface. Lying there half-asleep on this slow, mid-week morning, the fourth period announcements echo through the empty halls,...

Investigative Report: What is a Fake Bra? (Satire)

Investigative Report: What is a Fake Bra? (Satire)

Maya Millner, Editor-in-Chief October 14, 2021

“What’s a fake bra?” The quad buzzed with frustration. Just minutes earlier, the PA had sounded with the familiar “Teachers, please pardon the interruption.” It was Assistant Principal Russel...

Written by your blue bubble boo:

Skylar Ball, Opinion Editor April 20, 2020

It’s the beginning of the school year and you’re sitting in math class. As the teacher takes roll, students pass around a sheet of paper, each adding their name and phone number before passing it on....

A Straight Guide from a Gay Guy

A Straight Guide from a Gay Guy

Henry Mueller, Staff Writer March 2, 2020

DONT’S Don’t say “oH mY gOd i WaNt A gAy BeSt FrIeNd!” OK, I get the message; who doesn’t want wonderful people around them? But, saying things like this implies that you want a gay friend just...

Crohn’s Disease? More Like Cool People’s Disease

Crohn’s Disease? More Like Cool People’s Disease

Skylar Ball, Opinion Editor December 13, 2019

At the beginning of the school year, I began to feel a great sickness within me, but I brushed it aside as I had more important things to worry about, such as earning the validation of my disgraced editor,...

Palis Cookie Craze V1

Pali’s Cookie Craze V1

Maya Millner, Editor-in-Chief November 12, 2019

On December 6, 2018, I, Maya Millner, purchased my very first Pali cookie. I heard about them all semester. I witnessed my friends arriving late to lunch holding small, chocolate-stained plastic bags....

Freshmen: An Enlightened View

Freshmen: An Enlightened View

Paige Snepp, Opinion Editor October 4, 2019

My one source of solace in this enervating daily routine of school comes from observing the non-stop buffoonery of the freshman class. One can usually identify these students by their grating voices and...

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